I spent the WHOLE day today shopping for a Xmas tree for The Git, who has been complaining as we cannot find ours. I am on a limited budget so had to shop around, which meant driving to the 'Great God' Trago Mills. Look it up if you do not understand what Trago is. Trago must have the biggest selection of artificial/real trees in the world. The decorations take up a whole floor and despite me being completely convinced that I would go for a purple/black thing this year, the traditionalist in me won through and it went Green, Gold....oh and erm Green and Gold. Pathetic! Most pathetic is me buying an artificial tree.
I do feel as though I should have gone to the gardening department and found a completely unsuitable live/half dead 8ft tree that would shed pine needles in my driving seat and wreck my car for a year. Oh, and then getting it into the house would involve breaking out the hoover, six times a day for the next four years! Honestly, I have done that for the last 20 odd years but three years ago...I gave up, forgive me.
Onto tonight. This is my story.
PART ONE
1. Buy pre-lit 6ft tree at ASDA.
2. Drive to Trago, spend 17 hours wandering around being a bit dazed by all the bling
3. Want a tasteful and sort of Eastern European Tree with lots of wooden ornaments, raffia and NO tinsel.
4. Realise that no 2 son wants Bling.
5. Spend another 3 hours trying to decide.
6. Go for a coffee and think ' yep, I am going to go for raffia and lovely wooden ornaments'.
7. Get into car with GOLD,GOLD,GOLD....glitter dripping off my car keys, in my hair, on my fingers. Cannot see through glasses due to glitter.
8. Pick up The Git. Tell him what I have bought him. Git feigns utter disgust at my choice and refuses to decorate tree.
PART TWO
9. Have a glass of the pink whilst contemplating evil boxes containing Tree and Blingy things.
10. Have another as I am not sure how to proceed. I have bought very cheap decorations, meaning I have to spend at least four hours threading crap gold thread through them.
11. Struggle with 'Pre-Lit Tree'. Spend five hours tweaking and making sure it is just so, Think I've got it?
12.Have another glass of the pink whist I think what to do, spend just another hour making 'sure' the damn thing looks even. Bit nasty when you are a perfectionist.
13. Start hanging the baubles.
14. The Git wanders down (he should be in bed). 'That looks soooo...good Ma'. Can I join in - its 11.30pm. 'No bugger off'!
15. Got the Tree up - all new - all scary but I did it.
PART THREE
16. Turn all lights off.
17. Feck...I did a good job, don't really like the LED lights though.
18. Looking forward to tomorrow as The Git and I are going to make a few gold Skate Boards to hang on the tree.
19., Note to self - do not ever, ever loose your Christmas decorations. I miss all the ones that mean a lot to me, including, Sian, James and Josh's contributions. The little gorgeous ones that they made in Primary School.
20. Sigh with relief and have a flipping glass of the pink!
Na Nite
Namaste
Muse x
