Tyrannical Technology

I watched a programme last night about a family going back and living life in the 70's. Tonight, they were going back to life in the 80's...but I missed it! Doesn't matter, last nights programme gave me enough food for thought. The 70's wasn't such a bad decade. It obviously provoked a huge nostalgia within myself but the difference in technology between that decade and now is what stuck with me.

Can you imagine trying to explain to your long departed loved ones, the technology today, if, by some chance, they returned in 2010? I lost my two Grandfathers as a teenager. One, Samuel Anderson was a very clever technical man and could build anything with his hands. The other, John French Jones was an upholsterer, of some note and could make anything with his hands. Both were sincere men and wonderful Grandfathers.

But, HOW? would I explain to them the advances in technology. I will give it a go and if my technical knowledge is not up to scratch, then forgive me.

THE CASH POINT
You do not have a cheque book or a wage packet anymore. You have a slim plastic thing called a cash card, it has a tiny micro chip in it and it only works for you. There is a hole in the wall, where you furtively glance in all directions around you, before keying in a four digit number, known as a PIN number and ask the hole in the wall for money. This is obviously not an unknown thing to you as in your time, you actually had a hole in the wall where you stored your cash but this is a much more shiny hole in the wall that often refuses to give you YOUR money as the bank server has gone down!

THE MOBILE PHONE
Is a phone you can carry around with you in your pocket. There are also chips in it, not of the fish variety but micro. It comes with a set of irritating ring tones. They are very loud and annoy lots of people around you. It rings at the most inopportune times and you can never find it in your handbag/pocket. Lots of people like to include you in their private lives by talking loudly into it in front of you. Even if you are 10 you are not left in peace and the 'my watch has stopped' excuse does not work anymore....brutal! People also use it to text. In Samuel's language this is SMS and in John's....Morse code. Texts are also annoying as you have to answer by pushing lots of stupidly small buttons! If you switch the Mobile Phone off your family immediately call the emergency services as they fear the worst. The truth is that T Mobile is crap!

THE CD PLAYER/MP3/DOWNLOADING TECHNOLOGY
Lots to explain here. As you know we had vinyl and reel to reel and I mourn its loss. Then we progressed to cassette tape, which you grumbled about but accepted the loss of sound quality (Samuel). We were all as fed up as you and so the electronic giants decreed that we should listen to something called a Compact Disc. It was supposed to be indestructible and the early ones were about as enduring as a lit match! Ho...Hum, we persevered and finally had a decent CD to listen to. Then....they pulled the rug from under our feet! They introduced downloading, MP3 players and other terrible thing such as Pod casts (note Dave Raven, you are immune from this...) and this Granddaughter cannot possibly attempt to explain all that as she is a bit of a technophobe herself. Suffice to say. I like my Cd's, I like to buy something that I can look at!

PERSONAL COMPUTERS
Alas, I am probably unable to explain this to you as I suffer with very, very bad computer rage. Basically it is a processor, which is supposed to do what you tell it to do. Trust me on this....it doesn't, it lies, causes you to pull your hair out, stamp your foot and wonder why you are actually using the thing! Sorry, I have failed miserably but, these days I forget as much as I learn.

So my lovely Grandfathers. I know in my heart that one of you would have been like a big kid in a sweet shop and the other (like me) would have been scratching his head...

Miss You x

Be Kind to Each Other

Muse xxx

PS NO! I cannot explain the WWW...it is too bloody hard!