The Mothership came to visit for a few days this week, dragging the long suffering Pa with her. The Mothership is one of her nicknames, the other is Hyacinth. Is it old age that causes adored but challenging parents to misbehave or something else? Do they secretly think, 'Ha! I am getting on so I will cause as much mayhem as possible'. It is a bit like that famous poem, 'Warning' by Jenny Joseph, which I will post on the side bar. One of my favourites by the way.
I hadn't spent a lot of time with them recently so I was looking forward to it. Hyacinth has long been a 'bag lady'. She loves bags. Make up bags, cool bags, handbags and has a special place in her heart for large suitcases that weigh at least 20 kilos when they are empty! In came the bags and underneath them somewhere, I did spot Pa for a moment but this was a fleeting glimpse as he toiled to offload the car.
Hyacinth is very glamorous and feminine for her age ( this is, obviously the reason for the bags) but is sadly hard of hearing. She endured a terrible operation to remove a mastoid from her left ear when she was a child and has always been profoundly deaf in that ear. The other has worked hard throughout her life and is on its way out too. She has dealt with this in a quiet dignified way and lip reads very well, never ever complaining.
However well behaved Hyacinth is at the start of a visit, things generally deteriorate quite quickly. The TV volume starts low with subtitles and The Archers is listened to only as a special treat. Hyacinth does not understand the modern world and can be often be found trying to turn up the TV volume with Pa's mobile! Hence the creeping up of the TV volume in the lounge, The Archers at full blast in the kitchen and The Proms thundering through the bedroom. We are usually far too polite to comment and take refuge in the garden. A garden is a good place of refuge during these times!
Onto other matters. Why do parents drink so many cups of Tea? Personally, if I had to put the kettle on that many times I would cut out the kettle and just take it intravenously. Reading glasses are a difficult thing and hours are spent searching for them, only to find they have been sat on and are unrecognizable. My theory is that reading glasses are so cheap because they are made to be sat on. I once dated a 40 something guy that bought 10 pairs at once - sensible chap. Must remember that for their next visit. I should be careful of what I say on the subject as I am in limbo with my distance glasses at the moment and they are constantly perched on the end of my nose whilst I squint at the mobile or the newspaper!
I think what troubles me the most is that they think I am still 6 years old. I am constantly reminded to wash my hands, use a napkin, go to the loo before going out and 'don't' use too much salt. The other irritant is bedtime. Why do they think I should got to bed at 10pm. 'Time you were off to bed darling' said Pa last night at 10.30pm. Bless!
I loved having them to visit, caught up with Ma and Pa was my hero, spending long hours under now defunct washing machine, cutting hedge and fixing my bathroom light. Despite their idiosyncrasies they are mine and I adore them but its nice to have my space back again.
Namaste
Muse x
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