Had I realised it was going to be one of those days where life throws seven kinds of shit at you, I wouldn't have bothered getting out of bed. As I have found out by my experiences and those of my friends, if things go wrong they don't just go pear shaped they go pumpkin shaped! I had a lot to do as the Mother Ship is currently on approach and landing tomorrow.
The first disaster came when The Git fell off his bike. Just like his mother, he doesn't do things by halves, he likes to go the whole hog. His already impressive collection of bruises and grazes was added to with one gravel rash thigh, two gravel rash hands and a pulled muscle. His screams had me running from the house, half dressed and desperately searching for the source of the noise. He's okay but I am getting too flipping old to deal with these panics. My heart was beating so hard, I thought I would pass out. After gaining a lot of sympathy from me, I have now switched tactics and am very unimpressed that I am having to run around after him. Also WHY? as a mother, do you actually relax for a moment and something awful happens to your offspring. Note to self, never ever relax!
I went to Asda and he insisted accompanying me on his crutches. Arrived, found my friend Neil and demanded to know why there were no wheel chairs. Three stolen and two in for repair apparently. Words fail me. Nope I won't rant about disabled rights on this but honestly....
Arriving home with a load of bags, I could not find my key. I had somehow lost it. How stupid is that? I cannot think for the life of me what I did with the bloody thing. Time I got myself a key ring the size of a tennis ball. Mind you, the day I was having I would have been sure to lose it even if it had been attached to the Titanic!
My neighbour Angie came out and gave me a waterproof as I was dressed in some of my most frivolous summer finery. I phoned a locksmith as there were no windows open. I had actually lost a key a few weeks ago and Angie helped me break in whilst sternly lecturing me about the stupidity of leaving a top window open.
Two very helpful members of the opposite sex arrived . I say 'helpful' but it took them and hour and a half to drill out the lock! What is it about the Male of the Species? I have to say that I am a complete blondie about these matters but is it actually that difficult? Ask a man to put together some flat pack furniture and you will understand what I am saying. Is there a man out there that can carry out a repair, stop a leaking loo or even cut a simple hedge without breaking something or peppering the air with curses that would make a sailor blush? Find me one and I'll marry him! This obviously excludes Penfold.
The final insult today was that my washing machine is refusing to spin and I have blown three light bulbs. Ah well...it can only get better. The washing machine can bloody wait until tomorrow!
The Muse household is back to some sort of normality. I have cleaned up the Locksmiths mess, showered and patched up The Git, made a Sweet Potato, Ginger and Butternut Squash Soup for the folks and now I need a bath and a glass of the pink!
I still have Friday the 13th to look forward to. Deep joy....
Be Careful Out There
Namaste
Muse x
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